Public transport

Hello blog,

I just wanted to tell you that i still don´t know anything about my future, but thanks to too many exciting travel books i´m formulating all kinds of plans mostly involving irresponsibly living in different countries for as long as possible.

I´m in the internet cafe (again - i keep the internet cafe economy of Bogotá afloat) as i have no classes today and am free to take leisurely strolls around the famous Librería Lerner and have lunch with the charming Cherie in the bakery down the road which does a shit-hot almuerzo for $6,000 pesos (2 quid). I don´t know why everyone in Colombia isn´t obscenely fat since your average lunch comes with a massive bowl of soup containing chicken, beans, platano and potatoes, then a slab of meat or chicken with rice, more platano and either beans, inexplicable spaghetti or chips. And a pint of juice. And maybe a cheeky empanada a few hours later, just to stave off hunger...

It´s a beautiful day today, strange for it not to rain at least once during the day but at the moment it´s blazing sunshine and a nice warm city atmosphere. The thing i like best about this type of weather is very late afternoon, when the sun lights up the mountains and they look very fake and painted on, and all the streets have this delicious warm smell of hot bricks and dust, and they radiate out the heat of the day and you hopefully think that tonight you might be able to sleep with something less then your customary five blankets (FIVE) but it gets to 11pm and everything´s freezing and back to normal.

A bit more about Kapuscinski - when he returned to Poland after years as that country´s only foreign correspondant he had lived through 27 revolutions and coups, been jailed 40 times and survivied 4 death sentences. Also he mentioned in "The Shadow of The Sun" a guy that spent years travelling around the Sahara who one, dying of thirst in the middle of the desert, cut open his veins and drank his own blood in order to survive. Can you believe that!

Nothing quite so thrilling going on around here, tonight i will be translating a presentation for work which the chancers only sent me 5 minutes ago and want it for Sunday morning, cheeky bastards. The last one i did was for the World Bank and resulted in the uni getting given a loan of some unimaginable sum of money in order to construct new buildings, which is certainly something.

Here are me and Cherie enjoying a tinto in the National Coffee Park near Manizales:

And this is the Valle de Cocora near Salento, full of the national palm tree of Colombia and complete with rather out-of-place cow in the bottom right hand corner. The place was also filled with equally out-of-place soliders with big guns, you´d just be sitting there getting tucked into a plate of the local speciality (trout with patacón, a big crispy pancake made out of platano and deepfried, needless to say we had this delectable dish for four days on the trot) and suddenly everything´s gone a bit military. Everything was very calm though, for the most part the soldiers seemed to be enjoying the crap lounge music being sung to guests of a swank restaurant (not the one we were eating in, needless to say) by an unspeakably suave chap in a white suit, or cracking on to nice local girls. Perhaps the best thing about this day was catching a Jeep (traditional mode of transport in the Eje Cafetero, there´s even a town somewhere (whose name escapes me) where every year they have a big procession of Jeeps all loaded up with sacks of coffee and flowers and proudly drive them through the streets) back to Salento and me and Mark getting to ride on TOP of that bad boy! The road was amazing as well, quite a lot of it was in very good nick and you just flew along beside this windy river among rolling green mountains and little farms painted red and green with flowers all over the verandas, wee boys on bikes sailing along beside excited dogs and overhanging trees that you had to watch out for and duck at the appropriate moment. Life in Colombia means a life of extremely interesting public transport. During the course of this holiday i travelled on Jeeps, buses (tiny and enormous), chiva (a big van with benches that fit 6 people, all painted brightly coloured and with no glass in the windows, just coffee sacks you could roll down if it rained, and the driver had two Virgin Marys positioned on either side of the rear view mirror, noe that lit up when he accelerated and one that lit up when he braked. Those Virgins were going like strobe lights as the guy sped along the alarmingly windy road, braking every 2 minutes to let more people on, to avoid motorbikes, simply to admire the view at some points...), cable cars, busetas, taxis, everything!

Housing success and empty streets

Today's buseta was driven by a total frustrated boy racer, blasting out Amy Winehouse at top volume and weaving in and out of huge ques of other buses, honking at everything that moved and appearing to head for motorcyclists on purpose as if he got extra points for giving them the fright of their lives. Greatest method of public transport known to man. Imagine just sitting there, clinging on to the seat in front of you for dear life, your legs all cramped because nothing in Colombia is really made for people over 5 foot 6, while a tiny old lady systematically gives every passenger the evil eye until one of them caves in and gives her a seat, the guy beside you absolutely reeks of onions and every 5 minutes the driver carreers across about 4 lanes to pick up a new passenger, even though there are already about 15 extra people crammed all up the aisle making a delightful mockery of the large sign on the side of the bus that says "No standing passengers admitted". I love it.

In other news, i finally got a flat!! It took nearly 3 weeks of thankless trudging round apartments, every time being told that we needed 3 months bank statements, or were to leave a disgustingly large deposit, or that we had to rent it for a year and not 10 months, or basically that they just didn't like foreigners much and weren't giving us their nice flat to mess up with our outlandish foreign ways, no senor.
BUT, someone finally relented and kindly rented us their flat, in La Candelaria which is the old colonial centre of Bogota, the bit with all the different coloured houses and steep cobbled streets. My house is of course a wee 60's apartment effort, but it has a massive patio inside for BBQ action and a nice kind of wood-panelled sauna effect in all the rooms. And it's on Calle 13. Like the band! It's round the corner from the Luis Arango library which is the most visited library in the world, i'll be iin there like a rat up a drainpipe as soon as i get the business of buying a bed, a fridge, a washing machine and all that sorted out. I'm currently in what is probably Bogota's only kosher internet cafe which is down the stairs from the flat, this keyboard is a total belter and has the letters in Hebrew on it.

Aside from all this flat excitement i've been having a very excellent time, although the Saturday morning class (who were made to sit through 2 episodes of Still Game, incidentally) scuppered my holiday plans i've had a belter of a weekend in Bogota. On Sunday i went to see a free salsa concert in the Plaza Bolivar, ate some kind of fish which had been deep-fried whole (mmm), got my picture taken wearing a t-shirt that says "Tengo la camisa negra" and a pair of disgusting red sunglasses in front of the que of people waiting to pay their respects at the coffin of Fanny Mikey, a renowned Colombian-Argentinian actress who just died, then i went for a look at the Botero museum and topped it all off with a night on the coctails in the swanky northern part of the city. Asking for a martini in this city basically gets you half a pint of gin, needless to say some abysmal Scottish dance moves were cracked out before too long.

Yesterday once we'd finished the flat gubbins we went to get some food on the Avenida Jimenez, which is where all the trade in emeralds goes on. The cafe was in the building which used to be the headquarters of El Espectador, the paper Gabriel Garcia Marquez wrote for when he lived in Bogota. We ate in the basement and there were lots of black and white photos of Bogota full of big chrome trimmed cars and men in hats. Later on i got a lift back up to the penthouse, and it was just getting dark and the city was totally deserted. When the clouds are low they cover the tops of the mountains which you can always see in the city, a big cold blanket of grey over the whole city. Since it was a Monday night and a public holiday as well everyone was in their houses or out of town, and you'd drive past these desolate streets strung with telephone wires and full of potholes, with nobody around except a man in the distance carrying a suitcase. There's a strange kind of melancholy about the place at times, it doesn't seem like a big city at all but a ghost town, or lost relic from a black and white film.

I think i'm in love...

with these buses:Unfortunately i've not been on one in a few days because i've been cooped up with the British Council learning about English teaching. We got a security briefing from an old school chap from the British Embassy, total ex Marine, probably killed hunners of guys with his bare hands and all that. The briefing was totally reasonable, just telling you to keep your wits about you like in any big city, although after discussing kidnapping, drink spiking, robbery and so on he glanced down the list of details for the language assistants and boomed "GLASGOW?! Who's from Glasgow? This is a HOLIDAY for you, girl!". Aye cheers mate.

Some drunken plans were laid last night to learn the accordion, that's something for yous all to look forwards to when i come back.